1. |
Factory Man
01:28
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VERSE 1
The man works hard
He does not have
The time to stop
To make it perfect
Even as
He finishes one
He thinks ahead
He’s on to the next project
If you ask
He says he wants
His life to mean
More than just TV
The factory
Opens again
To make each day
Everything it can be
CHORUS 1
Factory Man
Making the songs
Factory Man
All the day long
Factory Man
Churning them out
Factory Man
Who cares what they’re about?
VERSE 2
Making stuff
Is such hard work
Even the junk
Is not so easy
People say
Why even try
Their mocking tone
Makes him feel queasy
Still he finds
The strength within
To churn out yet
Another release
Wondering
If the next one
Will at last be
His long sought masterpiece
CHORUS 2
Factory Man
One after the next
Factory Man
Leaves daydreamers perplexed
Factory Man
Doesn’t dream he just does
Factory Man
He sings them just because
CHORUS 1
Go Go Go Factory Man
Making the songs
Go Go Go Factory Man
All the day long
Go Go Go Factory Man
Churning them out
Go Go Go Factory Man
Who cares what they’re about?
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2. |
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VERSE 1
Deep in the western forest
A most interesting unicorn
Yearns to start a rock and roll band
And what he loves best
Is to play his horn
As loudly as he can
A curious dog
Asks to join in on the drums
And a spider plucks her web to play bass
They make benches out of logs
And invite everyone to come
Spread the word all over the place
CHORUS 1
Johnny Unicorn, blow your horn
Johnny Unicorn, let the music soar
Johnny Unicorn, this is why you were born
Johnny Unicorn, what have you got in store?
VERSE 2
Johnny counts off every day
Until their grand live debut
The band rehearses for a full year
Finally its time to play
But what are they to do
When the audience fails to appear?
They still perform as if
The seats were all filled
With a cheering, dancing crowd
Because they know
That it’s plenty of fun
Just to play their music loud
CHORUS 2
Johnny Unicorn, blow your horn
Johnny Unicorn, let the music soar
Johnny Unicorn, this is why you were born
Johnny Unicorn, you know the score
CHOURS 3
Johnny Unicorn, come and blow your horn
Johnny Unicorn, let the music soar
Johnny Unicorn, this is why you were born
Johnny Unicorn, play for us some more
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3. |
Owen's New Friend
02:26
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VERSE 1
Way up in Green Mountain country
Where the trees define the land like the beard on a rugged man’s face
(You know, up where the lumberjacks dwell)
Lives a man who loves to watch movies
Owen is his name and he takes life in stride with good grace
(He’s a laid back one, that Owen)
One night as he sat himself down
To watch a brand new horror flick that was shot with more heart than bucks
(Those are the best)
He heard the scurrying of big heavy feet
And saw in the window a beast as big as a truck…
(Like a big ol’ monster truck… but covered in fur)
CHORUS 1
It was Bigfoot
It was Bigfoot
It was Bigfoot
It was Bigfoot
It was Bigfoot
In Owen’s yard
It was Bigfoot
It looked mean and hard
It was Bigfoot
But it seemed pretty meek
It was Bigfoot
When it started to speak
VERSE 2
“Sorry to be a bother
But my feet are so sore from wandering through these woods
And I saw that you’re starting a movie
If it’s not an imposition I’d like to watch too if I could?
And the low budget films are my favorite
It’s fun to be immersed in the oddity on display
(Those are the best)
I’ve brought along some nuts and berries
I’m more than happy to share with you if I can stay
Please let me stay”
CHORUS 2
Bigfoot is a film fan
Bigfoot is a film fan
Bigfoot is a film fan
Bigfoot is a film fan
It was Bigfoot
Owen said “come in”
It was Bigfoot
Let the movies begin!
It was Bigfoot
They watched all night
It was Bigfoot
’Til the sun shone bright
BRIDGE
[Dialog extract from classic monster movie]
CHORUS 3
Owen and Bigfoot
Owen and Bigfoot
Owen and Bigfoot
Are friends
Owen and Bigfoot
Launched a film festival
They’re buddies until
The end
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4. |
Melvin is Banned
01:53
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VERSE 1
Melvin sings his songs
He tries to play by the rules
But it seems the gatekeepers
Have played Melvin for a fool
CHORUS
Melvin is banned
He doesn’t understand
This is not what he had planned
Melvin is banned
VERSE 2
Melvin asks what he did wrong
He is told not to ask again
Melvin only wants to sing
So he opens his mouth, and then
CHORUS
BRIDGE
Judith says, “I will listen to your songs.”
Judith says, “People have done you wrong.”
Judith says, “We will see this through.”
Judith says, “I will sing with you”
CHORUS
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5. |
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CHORUS
Let me tell you about a musician I know
A most friendly sort and all-round fine fellow
His name is Jon and he goes with the flow
But there's one thing he has a hard time letting go...
VERSE 1
The evil ones are everywhere
In offices low and high
Their human facades cover up
The cruel monsters who lurk inside
Jon thinks about the films he loves
Where all it takes to ring a demon's bell
Is a foolhardy man with a big shotgun
Who can blast it right back to hell
PRE-C
But in real life there is only one way
That Jon can fight the monsters of today
CHORUS
He won't use a gun, that's the tool of his foe
You can't vanquish demons by stooping down low
His voice and his uke seem more apropos
He'll let music and common sense strike the death blow
VERSE 2
There is something fun about a horror flick
With blood and quips galore
Where monsters openly claim their goal
To end humanity forevermore
The monsters Jon fights against love to lie
And some dumb folk buy right in
When faced with a human as bad as a devil
Jon knows the best way to win
PRE-C
Because in real life there's only one way
That Jon can fight the monsters of today
CHORUS x2
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6. |
Charlie Makes Movies
02:17
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VERSE 1
I just got back from the big blockbuster
Playing on the multiplex screen
Lots of spectacle and explosions
As polished a film as I’ve ever seen
It wasn’t half bad, but it struck me as odd
The credits took so long to get through
‘Cause all the efforts of all those people
Don’t match what just a couple of friends can do
CHORUS 1
Charlie makes movies about monsters
Charlie makes films in his backyard
Do one take, then it’s on to the next shot
Family and neighbors make up the stars
VERSE 2
His films create a remarkable world
Filled with killers and creatures galore
Still they are as good-natured as ice cream
Sans any sex or bad language or gore
HIs characters have a unique way of speaking
His crowd scenes look conspicuously small
But you’ll come away with a grin on your face
And that’s really the point of it all
CHORUS 2
Charlie makes movies about monsters
Charlie makes films in his backyard
Most of the world may ignore them for now
But every time he makes one he feels like a star
BRIDGE
You’d be amazed at the special effects
That you are able to get
Just by using pillow fill
Roto software, glass and a little bit of skill….
And a whole lot of will
CHORUS 1 & 2
Charlie makes movies about monsters
Charlie makes films in his backyard
Do one take, then it’s on to the next shot
Family and neighbors make up the stars
Charlie makes movies about monsters
Charlie makes films in his backyard
Most of the world may ignore him for now
But every time he makes one he knows he’s a star
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7. |
Heavy Frog
01:23
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Heavy Frog
Comes out to play
Heavy Frog said he would
Bring chips today
Heavy Frog
Let me be clear
Chips are all I want
Chips are why I’m here
Don’t want crackers
Cheese makes me choke
To hell with carrot sticks
They are such a joke
Just bring me chips
I don’t care how
You made a promise
So feed me now
Heavy Frog
Pounds on his drums
But where are the chips
To fill our tums
Heavy Frog
I don’t like deceit
Where are my chips
I want to eat
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8. |
Pete's Growing a Beard
01:11
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VERSE 1
Pete looked kinda OK the way he looked before
But his wife now screams when he walks through the door
I mean she thinks he looks hot, not cowers in fear
She gets the look in her eye that she wants to come near
But he has to say no, he’s too tired today
After spending all afternoon running away
From all the neighborhood ladies roaming the streets
‘Cause everyone noticed something new about Pete
CHORUS
He’s growing a beard
He’s growing a beard
Look everyone, Pete’s growing a beard
He’s growing a beard
Pete’s growing a beard
Check it out everyone Pete’s growing a beard
VERSE 2
Pete goes to the club to play his bass
But the crowd is enthralled by the beard on his face
Band leader Matt screams “look at me!”
But who cares about smooth cheeks like a baby
Pete gives the fans what they want and struts the stage
Matt storms right off in a terrible rage
But really who cares, with the excitement right there
And all through the night they cheer Pete’s whisker hair
CHORUS
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9. |
Does Tom Dance?
02:37
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VERSES 1 & 2
Tom plays guitar
That much we know
Watch his fingers fly
He puts on quite the show
The fire in his eyes
Sets the world aglow
Tom plays guitar
That much we know
Tom likes to act
We know that too
Outlandish characters
Too fun to be true
He does funny accents
Much better than you
Tom likes to act
We know that too
CHORUS
But does Tom dance
Does he like to spin around
Does he shuffle his feet and sway
Until he floats right off the ground
Does Tom dance
Is he the first one on the floor
When the night is done and the band packs up
Is he begging them for more
VERSE 3
Tom’s a family man
He does it well
Romances his wife
The kids think he’s swell
Says to his friends
“Come sit a spell”
Tom’s a family man
He does it well
CHORUS
But does Tom dance
Does he like to spin around
Does he shuffle his feet and sway
Until he floats right off the ground
Does Tom dance
Is he the first one on the floor
When the night is done and the band packs up
Is he begging them for more
BRIDGE
The radio plays
The latest dance craze
Tom’s feet tap tap tap out the rhythm
And his eyes start to glaze
Tom rises from his seat
He’s grooving to the beat
He can’t resist the call of the music
It makes him feel complete
CHORUS
Tom does dance
He likes to spin around
He loves to shuffle his feet and sway
Until he floats right off the ground
Tom does dance
He’s the first one on the floor
When the night is done and the band packs up
He’s begging them for more
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10. |
Gathering
01:59
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VERSE 1
Everybody in the world today
Wants to punch somebody in the face
We yell at each other through computer screens
And lose connection with the human race
But there’s a special place where we can go
Where everyone is invited to join in the song
Maybe even dance if we are in the mood
Only thirty may show up but each of us belong
CHORUS
Coming from Belgium
Coming from Australia
Coming from Canada
Coming from next door
From all over the world
We arrive in Massachusetts
For the big Extravaganza
That the night has in store
VERSE 2
Some people wake up each day
Always striving to create
And if the last one sucked, then who really cares?
The next one may be great
The jealous ones too scared to try
Like to shake their heads and criticize
But here you’ll always find support
When the band commands us to socialize
CHORUS x2
Coming from far away
Coming from near
It’s a most special night
That happens just once a year
From all over the world
We come to commune
The show is four hours long
And it’s over too soon
Coming from Belgium
Coming from Australia
Coming from Canada
Coming from next door
From all over the world
We arrive in Massachusetts
For the big Extravaganza
That the night has in store
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11. |
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Congratulations making one masterpiece this year
You did yourself proud
I was very impressed by the great job you did
In fact, I’d say I was wowed
Congratulations on your second masterpiece this year
Every bit as good as the first
You definitely got in line at least a second time
When genius was disbursed
You keep making music
Keep making music
Keep making music, man
You keep making music
Keep making music
Keep making music, because you can
Congratulations making a third masterpiece this year
Who knew lightning could strike again
Most people don’t make even one masterpiece per decade
You’re a prodigy among men
Congratulations on your fourth masterpiece this year
It’s getting rather absurd
Most people would stop upon being ignored
You aren’t at all deterred
You keep making music
Keep making music
Keep making music, man
You keep making music
Keep making music
Keep making music, because you can
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12. |
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CHORUS
I got a flat tire driving home from a Motern Media show
VERSE 1
At the show Matt told us
That you can make money
Posting tracks on Spotify
With titles of hit songs
I doubt that Matt
Will reimburse my tire
But if I apply his teachings
I’ll earn cash before too long
CHORUS
VERSE 2
I checked the Billboard chart
And at the top of the list
Was the song “God’s Plan”
By Drake
Wow, that seems
Oddly apropos
So you might think
This song is fake
But every word is true
And I wrote this song
And soon it will be on Spotify
‘Cause there’s no way
I’ll get money for my tire
If I don’t even
Try
CHORUS
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13. |
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14. |
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The Other Strange Man
I write songs inspired by Motern Media and the various artists who ascribe to the Motern philosophy.
I also have music on other subjects released under several other names.
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